


Cold Hands (Yours Too)

by hollyandvice (hiasobi_writes)



Series: Holly's Round Eight H/C Bingo Card [32]
Category: Rent - Larson
Genre: F/M, Near Death Experiences
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-29
Updated: 2017-10-29
Packaged: 2019-01-25 22:12:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12542336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hiasobi_writes/pseuds/hollyandvice
Summary: Her hands are cold and everything is desperation movement chaos and he doesn't dare think not againnot againbut there it is there it is and he clings to her, desperate and choking on the grief and the guilt and—Roger clings to what might be the last chance he has to hold Mimi in his arms. Takes place during "Your Eyes."





	Cold Hands (Yours Too)

Her hands are cold and everything is desperation movement chaos and he doesn't dare think not again _not again_ but there it is there it is and he clings to her, desperate and choking on the grief and the guilt and—

Her hands are cold, but they're moving, one twisting in his to turn and thread their fingers together, and his breath catches as his eyes fly open and there's a crease in her forehead like she's trying to find the strength to respond so he clings to her hand and prays to a god he isn't sure he believes in as he holds her and hopes and hopes and hopes.

Her hands are cold and she's still, so still, but for a tremor in the hand that clings to his and he reaches for that, desperate and hopeful and _desperate_ because this can't be the end for them this can't be the end for _her_ and he has no control over any of this all he can control is the way his own desperate eyes rest on hers like maybe his silent pleas will be enough.

Her hands are cold, but as he watches her eyelids twitch and tremble and then they're opening, her hand tightening around his again and it knocks the breath from his chest to see her eyes, warm and open and somehow _present_ as she looks into his and he doesn't know what he did to deserve her eyes on him like this, doesn't know what he did to deserve a second chance with her, doesn't know why the god he's not sure he believes in blessed him—blessed _them_ —this way but he'll take it, he'll take it and he'll seize the day this time, _no day but today_ and he'll hold onto her for as long as he has her.

Her hands are cold and her lips are trembling, but there's a tenuous smile on her face and he's so grateful to see it, to hear her words and feel her breath in the space between them and he knows she's not completely out of the woods yet, knows she isn't totally safe, but he also knows she's better than she was and sometimes that's all they can ask for. They can hold on and cling to her and support her and maybe, _maybe_ they'll be able to hang onto this blessing, but if nothing else he got to see her eyes one more time, got to hear her voice one more time, and he won't be ungrateful for even these small mercies.

Her hands are cold, but they're strong where they hold onto him, and he will hold on just as tightly, love her just as fiercely, and he knows this won't be easy—loving an addict never is; _love_ never is, and he knows this, he _knows_ but he doesn't care because she's worth it, she's always been worth it—but he does love her, he _does_ , and he'll be damned if he won't cling to her so tightly and so strongly and he won't give her a reason to leave again. He's not perfect, and he never will be, but he'll be damned if he won't at least _try_.

Her hands are cold and he can feel the tenuous thread of life in her too-quick pulse, but he knows, he _knows_ that at least now she's not alone.

Her hands are cold, but she's alive, and that's half the battle.

**Author's Note:**

> Unbeta'ed. Part of my Round Eight H/C Bingo Card. [Come hang with me on tumblr!](http://hollyandvice.tumblr.com/)


End file.
